How Old Are You?

One thing that you have to know about Zambia culture is that age matters. If you are young, it is very hard, if not impossible, to earn respect. Leadership and authority are based upon age. I knew this coming to Zambia, and I knew that it would be difficult to start and lead a program because of this fact.

Therefore, I took proactive steps to make myself appear older. For example, I grew out my facial hair so that I would look older. I will admit that my goatee does not look good, but it does make me look older. Another step I took was to make sure that I was extremely professional when interacting with the teachers. This includes making sure that I am extremely knowledgeable about the subjects that I am teaching. It also includes telling my credentials in a positive light. When people ask what I did before coming to Zambia, I always say that I taught school in the inner-city of Washington D.C. and got my Masters in Education. I never tell them how many years I taught unless they ask. This has been a difficult line to walk though because I have also tried to develop personal relationships with the teachers and many times the professional and personal do not mix. I feel in many ways that I have been successful in this endeavor though.

My feelings were validated this past week. After the training session on Thursday, I drove one of the teachers home. During our time in the car we began to talk, and he told me that his birthday was next week. Of course, I told him congratulations and asked him how old he was going to be. He told me 26, and I thought to myself, “Oh crap! You are my youngest teacher. Don’t ask how old I am?” (I am 25 by the way.) Unfortunately, my fears were validated when he did ask how old I was. I turned the tables on him though and asked him how old he thought I was. He briefly paused, thought for a second, and then said that he thought I was in my mid-thirties. VICTORY!

How many times in life do people rejoice when someone thinks they are ten years older than they actually are? How many times will I rejoice at that fact? What would my response be if you told me at 30 that I looked and acted 40? Whatever the case, to be successful in Zambia I needed to convince people that I am old and have the right to speak. I wish that the culture was not that way, but I cannot change that. But to do the work which I have been assigned, I just have to work to exude the qualities which the culture values. And one of those happens to be age.